People always joke about a woman named “Molly”. You know, the mythical woman who is perfect and does everything like a supermom. She has a house full of children; her house is always perfect and hot meals are cooked every night. She bakes cookies for the neighbors on a regular basis, works, does her family history, keeps a daily journal and her windows sparkle for heaven’s sake! “Molly” looks like a million bucks in her homemade clothing, makeup and beautiful hair-do. Oh, yah, and she sews clothing for her perfect children. Did I mention that when her husband comes home she greets him with a smile while he twirls her around and kisses her at the exact moment that her heel kicks up?
Everyone laughs when talking about “Molly”, except me. “Molly”, describes my mother exactly, and I mean every detail!!! I was so proud of myself when I called her at 10 o’clock one morning. “Hi! mom!” I said, anxious to brag about all that I accomplished so far. “I’ve already cleaned up the kitchen after making pancakes for the kids and I just finished making chili in the crock pot for tonight.” Then came her reply, “I’ve been busy, too. I got up early to work outside, trimmed the hedges and raked up all of the leaves in the yard. Then I took a shower and have just finished making home-made soup; the home-made rolls are rising on the stove.” My mother is absolutely incredible! I find joy watching this amazing woman.
Over the last 12 years, my joy has become a heartache. Slowly, but surely, that dreadful Alzheimer Disease is taking the mother I have always known away. This is a difficult journey for our family. She lost her ability to read, watch TV and entertain herself in the early stages of this disease. Our attitude of finding joy in the journey has helped us tremendously.
The day that mom met the stranger in the mirror is a blessing. She found a new best friend! Thankfully, there are many mirrors throughout the house. Mom pointed her finger at the stranger and smiled. “You are a beautiful woman!” she said. “Yes, you are….you’re beautiful!” Mom giggled and so did her friend. Day and night mom tried to coax her new found companion out of the mirror. Mom reassured her own reflection that everything would be alright.
I know that the mother I have always known is still there even though she cannot hold me or speak to me. She has spent a lifetime being kind to strangers and young people with problems. It only seems natural that she would reach out in kindness to the stranger in the mirror. For many years she has been kind to another stranger - me. Although she is confined to a bed and sleeps most of the time, I find joy in knowing that she is still a “Molly”.
Contributed by Renee from California
I enjoyed reading this story about my mother, Inga Critchfield Evans Baker. I was so blessed to be raised by her (sigh). I miss her. She passed away in October of 2012. Thank you, Beverly.
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